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Problems can be fixed

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  • Problems can be fixed

    A South Carolina farm wife called the local phone company to report her telephone failed to ring when her friends called - and that on the few occasions when it did ring, her dog always moaned right before the phone rang.

    The telephone repairman proceeded to the scene, curious to see this psychic dog or senile lady. He climbed a telephone pole, hooked in his test set, and dialed the subscriber's house.

    The phone didn't ring right away, but then the dog moaned and the telephone began to ring. Climbing down from the pole, the telephone repairman found:

    1. The dog was tied to the telephone system's ground wire via a steel chain and collar.

    2. The wire connection to the ground rod was loose.

    3 The dog was receiving 90 volts of signaling current when the number was called.

    4. After a couple of jolts, the dog would start moaning and then urinate.

    5. The wet ground would complete the circuit, thus causing the phone to ring

    which demonstrates that some problems CAN be fixed by pissing and moaning.
    I'd tell you I'm Scottish, but It's not polite to brag.

  • #2

    Ouch, poor dog! Need a little cheese to go with that wine!


    • #3
      Good job doogy. Hope someone will give you a medal.


      • #4
        Wipe the tears fae ma eyes

        Said the Englishman to the boastful Scot: ‘Take away your mountains, glens and lochs, and what have you got?’ ‘England,’ replied the Scot.

        Then there were two Scots who bet a pound on who could stay under water the longest. They’ both drowned.

        How do you disperse an angry Scottish mob?
        Take up a collection.

        How did the Grand Canyon come about?
        A Scotsman lost a sixpence.

        An Englishman, lecturing on his travels, was speaking disparagingly about the Scots in Canada and the mixing of the race with the Indians.
        ‘You’ll find,’ he said, ‘a great number of Scots half-breeds and French half*breeds, but you cannot find any English half-breeds.’
        ‘Not surprisingly,’ shouted a Scot in the audience. ‘The squaws had to draw the line somewhere.’