Things you need to know before getting married

[PRgirl]

Dr. James what is jacom?

[DrJames]

Well if you do not know where, you are not from there.

[Fuathas]

lmao.

Prolly fine thread. I suggest: a good divorce solicitor.

[Scottish_Republican]

Originally posted by Eleana
Coming back to SR's statement, that's so difficult, to find a man who is willing to find out about you first.

Well I try to. But unfortunately, us men have something called testosterone, which overrides a lot of the platonic stuff.

[PRgirl]

SR admits the hormones gets in the way of 'platonic' friendship interest. I don't think it has to. I know some men who have friends that are female for many years and have never had a sexual interest in them. Just friendship only. But a lot are already married. So, I guess that answers that question.

I still think SR, you should only settle for someone who has all the qualities you would like. Friendship, trust, respect, physical attraction, and tolerance and adaptability and acceptance for being who you are. Basically a woman who is not interested in changing you, and will put up with your idiosyncrasies and your way of being and all your flaws. And vice versa. And you, as I have said before, have a lot of good qualities. I like educated men (not necessary to be rich to be educated nowadays), I like intelligence, and a kind heart, and a sense of humour. I think you have all those things SR. So, what else? What else might be 'impeding' the progress for you?

I don't give a damn about looks. You could be short, tall, bald, not bald, a little chubby, skinny as a pole, dark hair, freckled, blonde, redhaired, with glasses on, without glasses, homely looking or handsome, it matters naught. You got the important stuff. Intelligence, kindness,and sense of humour. The rest is negotiable. Lol. Are women in Scotland blind to those fine male qualities? Hmmm, NO, I am sure they are not. So the other half of the lack of wife acquistion for you SR, is that you CHOOSE the wrong women for you. Yep, you do. You are like my Uncle Wilfredo. Thrice married. Keeps picking young good looking women with absolutely nothing in terms of intelligence, skills, abilities, kindness and etc. They all are harpies, dumb, disrespectful, spiteful, self centered. They can't cook or clean to save their lives, and don't work or study either. Instead they laze around all day spending my uncle's modest wages and complaining he doesn't make enough like a true sugar daddy does. But all of them have the body of some playboy fantasy and pretty faces, and tight clothing. Lol.

I think I know what Uncle Wilfredo finds the overriding factor too. LOL!!

[Eleana]

Originally posted by Scottish_Republican

Well I try to. But unfortunately, us men have something called testosterone, which overrides a lot of the platonic stuff.

Not that I would not know what you are talking about! That's perfectly ok. trust me when the woman is willing and you have the right touch all is perfectly fine.

What I meant was more a situation where you can't make immediate body contact out of various reasons. You may find a woman who sparks your interest but then after having clarified the details (age, status, children) many men don't even try to find out whether the woman might be worth the effort to get to know better first, they just run.

PRGirl said something important: I don't care how you look like. Well, that's very hitting the point for becoming friends but to fall in love, men and women alike tend to fall for cliches!

[PRgirl]

Eleana said:
PRGirl said something important: I don't care how you look like. Well, that's very hitting the point for becoming friends but to fall in love, men and women alike tend to fall for cliches!


Eleana and SR, maybe I am looking it through my own experiences. It was not love at first sight with my husband. My husband is a tall guy and athletic and young when I met him. But handsome? No he was not. I did not feel a flash of attraction for him. Nope, not at all. I just considered him a friend for a long time. Later on maybe a year after meeting him, I started to feel differently about him. I had gotten to know him, and saw his character and all his fine qualities. And the sexual attraction then came along. I think this theory of 'instant' whatever is not the case for many people. I can't speak for his feelings though. According to him, supposedly he took one look at me and thought, "With that woman I would like to spend the rest of my life." And he loved everything from the very beginning. I did not believe it much. But on our wedding day he showed me documented evidence of his 'lightning bolt' moment. Lol. His journal which he wrote in without fail in everyday, the day he met me July 9th, 1982...there it was, the confession of his 'instant' love. I had the task of telling him I did not feel the same way as he did. I fell in love slowly over time and getting to know him well. After so much conversation and real exchanges of thoughts and discussion and interest and values in common. It took me a year and a half to finally see him in a sexual way. And I think it was a good decision. Young people nowadays just jump in the sack together and never get to know each other.