"But let your 'Yes' be 'Yes' and your 'No' be 'No'" Parashat Toldot / Generations

[Mevaser]

"But let your 'Yes' be 'Yes' and your 'No' be 'No'" Parashat Toldot / Generations
Congregation Melech Yisrael, Toronto, Canada
Shabbat 4 Kislev 5764, November 29, 2003
http://www.cmy.on.ca / cmy@ca.inter.net
By Rabbi Jack (Yaacov) Farber

This week's Reading list:
* Beresheet / Genesis 25:19-28:9
* Mal'achi / Malachi 1:1-2:7
* Romim / Romans 9:6-13

Beresheet {27:30} It happened, as soon as Yitzchak (Isaac) had made an end of blessing Ya'akov (Jacob), and Ya'akov had just gone out from the presence of Yitzchak his 'ab (father), that Esav (Esau) his brother came in from his hunting. {27:31} He also made savoury food, and brought it to his 'ab. He said to his 'ab, "Let my 'ab arise, and eat of his son's venison, that your nefesh (soul) may bless me." {27:32} Yitzchak his 'ab said to him, "Who are you?" He said, "I am your son, your firstborn, Esav." {27:33} Yitzchak trembled violently, and said, "Who, then, is he who has taken venison, and brought it me, and I have eaten of all before you came, and have blessed him? Yes, he will be blessed." {27:34} When Esav heard the words of his 'ab, he cried with an exceeding great and bitter cry, and said to his 'ab, "Bless me, even me also, my 'ab." {27:35} He said, "Your brother came with deceit, and has taken away your blessing." {27:36} He said, "Isn't he rightly named Ya'akov? For he has supplanted me these two times. He took away my birthright. See, now he has taken away my blessing." He said, "Haven't you reserved a blessing for me?" {27:37} Yitzchak answered Esav, "Behold, I have made him your gibor (ruler), and all his brothers have I given to him for servants. With grain and new wine have I sustained him. What then will I do for you, my son?"

Do you see what took place here? Ya’acov deceived his father Yitzchak into giving him the blessing of the firstborn instead of giving it to his brother Esav. As we know Torah protects the rights of the firstborn son therefore the blessing rightly belonged to Esav. What Ya’acov did here is incomprehensible but understandable seeing as we all know that he was a chronic liar and a deceiver, that is until HaShem got hold of him and he changed.

When I considered this story, two things struck me as interesting. First as I mentioned above, Torah protects the rights of the firstborn (Devarim-Deuteronomy 21.15ff). Obviously this practice was in effect during Ya’acov’s time because Esav, as the firstborn, expected his blessing. So why did Ya’acov not cancel his blessing to Yitzchak and bless Esav? Second Yitzchak knew his son out and out lied and deceived him so again why did he not cancel his blessing? Yes, despite these two very valid reasons to break his vow and negate his blessing, Yitzchak did not renege on the blessing he bestowed on Ya’acov but instead told Esav that he could not bless him! Yitzchak had no way of knowing that Ya’akov was HaShem’s chosen vessel, through whom the nation of Yisrael (Israel) would be established. All he knew was that he was cheated and deceived by his own son, as he expressed in verse 35: {27:35} He said, "Your brother came with deceit, and has taken away your blessing." So what does HaShem want to teach us here?

Our sages teach us that there are two divisions of mitzvot (commandments), heavier and lighter. A heavier mitzvah (command) always takes precedence over a lighter mitzvah. For example: Honouring the Shabbat is an important mitzvah, honouring human life is also an important mitzvah. However if saving a human life required the breaking of the Shabbat, which would take precedent? In this case the saving of a life becomes the heavier mitzvah, while honouring the Shabbat becomes the lighter mitzvah. This occurs despite the fact that honouring the Shabbat is a very serious mitzvah, as we all know! I should note, as a point of reference, that in most cases, other than the one I just explained; Shabbat is the heavier mitzvah.

Yitzchak’s blessing of Ya’acov was similar to him making a vow. So as it appears in this story therefore, vows take precedence over the mitzvah of the rights of a firstborn son. We know this because Yitzchak honoured his blessing to Ya’acov despite the fact that he was deceived into giving it. This has far reaching implications. Many times I have to deal with cases where people obligated themselves; in marriages, in business, in personal relationships, in promises, as well as in many other areas, having done so because they were deceived. So what are they to do now?

Vows and blessings obviously are very important in the eyes of HaShem, therefore we should not take it lightly when we obligate ourselves in any way. It does not matter whether you were deceived into making that vow or not! It is still your obligation to fulfill it.

However as we also know from this story, HaShem took Ya’acov’s deceptiveness and turned it around for his advantage and HaShem’s glory. Therefore HaShem can certainly do the same for you. However why have to go through the pain and suffering both Ya’acov and Yitzchak had to go through because of this deception. Think twice before making a vow, any kind of vow and think twice before indiscriminately blessing someone, anyone. Both blessings and vows are very serious things and can have far reaching effect on both the giver and the receiver.

Kohelet / Ecclesiastes {5:5} Better is it that you should not vow, than that you should vow and not pay.

Now you know that blessings fit into this category as well!

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Baruch HaShem
Rabbi Jack (Yaacov) Farber

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