Chuckle Chuckle

[kathyv]

heeheehee1

Here's one,

When my hubby and I were in London we took a cab from Picadilly to our hotel. During the drive our cabbie related this story.....

One day he picked up a fare at Heathrow. It was dark and raining and he didn't see who this passenger was untill he had started off down the road. When he looked back he was shocked to see the Pope. That's right, The Pope! As they drove a long the Pope told hom how much he missed being able to drive himself around and the Cabbie, taking pity on him offered to let him drive. The Pope agreed and they pulled over, changed places and the Pope had his wish. While they were driving down the High Street, the Pope was so excited, driving and looking at all the sights, that he began weaving around in his lane. They got pulled over. The policeman asked him for his license then realised who it was! He asked the Pope to wait and ran to his car's radio. He contacted his superior and said he had just pulled over a cab with a VERY IMPORTANT PASSENGER! The Super asked, "who is it, the Lord Mayor?" The cop said, "no, not him." The super asked, "well is it the Prime Minister?" The cop said, "no, it's even more important!" The Super said, "well, is it the Queen?" The cop said, "no, I think it's God!" The super asked him why he would think that and the cop replied, "who ever it is, has the Pope for a chauffer!"

[Mistress]

[i]lol...



Awesome you guys.. lol

[Mistress]

[i]What do you get when you cross a Scottish sheep with a Peruvian Mountain Goat?

The Dolly Llama.

[Mistress]

[i] A Scots boy came home from school and told his mother he had been given a part in the school play. "Wonderful," says the mother, "What part is it?" The boy says "I play the part of the Scottish husband!" The mother scowls and says: "Go back and tell your teacher you want a speaking part."

[Mistress]

[i]Five Englishmen boarded a train just behind five Scots, who, as a group had only purchased one ticket. Just before the conductor came through, all the Scots piled into the toilet stall at the back of the car. As the conductor passed the stall, he knocked and called"Tickets, please!" and one of the Scots slid a ticket under the door. It was punched, pushed back under the door, and when it was safe all the Scots came out and took their seats. The Englishmen were tremendously impressed by the Scots' ingenuity. On the trip back, the five Englishmen decided to try this themselves and purchased only one ticket. They noticed that, oddly, the Scots had not purchased any tickets this time. Anyway, again, just before the conductor came through, the Scots piled into one of the toilet stalls, the Englishmen into the other. Then one of the Scots leaned out, knocked on the Englishmen's stall and called "Ticket, Please!" When the ticket slid out under the door, he picked it up and quickly closed the door

lmao

[bubblerocket]

Okay..this isn't very Scottish...but it is about travel and *supposedly* true EnJoY

An award should go to the United Airlines gate agent in Denver for being smart and funny, and making her point, when confronted with a passenger who probably deserved to fly as cargo.

During the final days at Denver's old Stapleton airport, a crowded United flight was cancelled. A single agent was rebooking a long line of inconvenienced travelers.

Suddenly an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket down on the counter and said, "I HAVE to be on this flight and it has to be FIRST CLASS."

The agent replied, "I'm sorry sir. I'll be happy to try to help you, but I've got to help these folks first, and I'm sure we'll be able to work something out." The passenger was unimpressed. He asked loudly, so that the passengers behind him could hear, "Do you have any idea who I am?"

Without hesitating, the gate agent smiled and grabbed her public address microphone. "May I have your attention please?" she began, her voice bellowing throughout the terminal. "We have a passenger here at the gate WHO DOES NOT KNOW WHO HE IS. If anyone can help him find his identity, please come to Gate 17."

With the folks behind him in line laughing hysterically, the man glared at the United agent, gritted his teeth and swore "**** you."

Without flinching, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry, sir, but you'll have to stand in line for that too."

[druid1616]

NICE