Moods

[Texasmujer]

IMPOVERISHED (FEEL LIKE A MILLION)

"There are people who have money and people who are rich." Coco G. Chanel

We must attend to our own well-being. In fact, we are the only ones who can do it properly.

Taking better care of your money is the same thing as taking better care of yourself.

What's your definition of luxury? Wearing real cashmere? A huge plate of fresh oysters all for your self? A spritz of Joy perfume every morning? Going first class when you usually fly steerage? A split of champagne with lunch? Luxury isn't so much in the thing itself; it's in the details: Having an OVERABUNDANCE
of raspberries, taking a taxi when you usually walk, having a hot shower after a week of camping. To feel rich, know what your luxuries are and get alittle on a regular basis---but not too much, too often, because then they won't be luxuries anymore.

Spoil yourself with little treats:
Take the afternoon off; try a new toothpaste; splurge on $15 worth of caviar; buy yourself a present and have it gift-wrapped; get a subscription to Oprah magazine; have your nails done; test-drive a BMW.



INNER AFFLUENCE
Try choosing the absolute best---not necessarily the most expensive---option in all the little things for a feeling of inner affluence. Do this to generate that feeling of well-being that being good to yourself brings---and because you deserve the best!

Choose your favorite painting at a local museum. Picasso? Matisse? You can visit it every day and get to know its every nuance. You will "own" that Picasso in a much more authentic way than the billionaire who barely glances at "his" Picasso.

USE THE GOOD CHINA EVERYDAY.


Be like a wealthy socialite: "You don't have to be rich, you just have to learn
to live rich." ---B.Pepper

[Texasmujer]

KINDHEARTED...comforting friends

Grieving people are often so dazed they don't know what kind of help they need. Don't just say, "Call me if there's anything I can do," or "Let us know if you need something," which often puts the whole burden on someone who is probably finding it difficult to cope. If you have expertise in an area where your friend needs assistance, offer it. Or look around to see how you might help and make a specific ofer that the bereaved person can simply say yes or no to, such as taking the kids for an weekend, putting an announcement in the newspaper, sitting by the phone to list everyone who calls, helping with the logistics. But don't do anything without asking or be too intrusive. Don't offer to do something if you don't intend to follow up.

What usually comforts the bereaved most are memories of the deceased and recollections about him, or her, to know his or her life meant something. Remember anniversaries, holidays, and birthdays---they'll be difficult. Good
friends continue to make comforting gestures after the first awful week.

If a friend asks disturbing questions ("What's the use of going on?"), he is not looking for a logical, direct answer. He needs to explore his feelings and would benefit by talking to a therapist. Try to work out th real purpose of such questions.

WRITE A NOTE RATHER THAN SEND A COMMERCIAL CARD.

Be a friend, not a therapist. The words you use aren't important; a grieving person doesn't need you to say anything in particular. The real comfort comes form knowing a friend is present during the pain.

[Texasmujer]

Laughing More

Get more laughter in your life: Keep books and videos on hand that make you giggle out loud. Assemble a folder fulled with funny clippings and cartoons today---don't wait until your feeling blue; you won't be motivated then.

Why did laughter evolve? Researchers believe it plays a part in social bonding, solidifying friendships, and pulling people into a group. Smiles are our first form of communication with another person---as a baby, and with strangers.

Play peek-a-boo with a baby. Get a puppy. Rediscover the silent movies. Try to see the world through the eyes of your favorite comic.

When you laugh, you become more relaxed. Even anticipating a funny event lowers stress. Laughter relieves an accumulation of nervous energy---think of it as a massage from the inside out.

It is said that blood pressure, heart rate, muscle tension, and stress hormone levels all drop when you laugh. Opinion is divided over whether laughter really
does promote physical healing. Perhaps it isn't so much laughing that heals but the beneficial effect of humor when used to confront life's challenges.

Laughing is a physical reflex, an automatic, convulsive spasm of the respiratory mechanism that occurs when we realize that there is more than one way to interpret the stimuli we are experiencing. We also laugh when we feel two contradictory emotions or when two frameworks of reference that
normally are separate are brought together in a way that seems to connect them. It's a startled response of the brain. We laugh when we're relieved and surprised, or when the unexpected happens.

Teachers know that laughter helps keep students interested. It makes us more receptive to new experiences, creates emotional intimacy, and encourages us to take ourselves less seriously.


Like yawning, laughter is contagious. You'll laugh more if you are with large groups os people who are in the mood to laugh, and if you are in a relaxed setting and feeling uninhibited. We laugh most often not in response to jokes, but when we're in happy relationships with friends.

Humor is one of the best and most psychologically mature and healhty
defenses. (In other words, it's a good way of controlling negative emotions.) Even when in great emotional pain, humor helps you detach from an event and maintain your dignity and a sense of self. When you make jokes about a bad situastion, you stil feel the bad feelings, but you can control them better.

[Texasmujer]

Mental health, like physical helath, depends on being in balance, with each component part working harmoniously together. Our moods are like the tides, ever-shifting. To stay balanced, be aware of your thoughts and what you tell yourself about what's happening.


"...our life has meaning, purpose and value, not by what we achieve or possess, but simply because we are.."---J. Kehoe, The Practice of Happiness


Be someone who loves life, Be someone who gets excited about little things, things like the first signs of spring or baby ducklings or a new book by your favorite author. People will smile at you patronizingly---it's so easy to make you happy. But isn't that better than being the reverse, someone who is easily made unhappy?


Take a pleasure break. Every day
Have FUN. It's better than Botox.


Don't let anyone else tell you what you ought to do for fun. It it gets boring fast, you regret later, or it makes someone else hunhappy, don't do it---even if it's what most people your age do.

[georgekidd]

Originally Posted by Texasmujer

Take a pleasure break. Every day
Have FUN. It's better than Botox.
Don't let anyone else tell you what you ought to do for fun. It it gets boring fast, you regret later, or it makes someone else hunhappy, don't do it---even if it's what most people your age do.

Is that not what your trying to do here ..... cant you see as you have had no replies that no-one gives a damn what you think

[Texasmujer]

Your feedback is noted...

[Texasmujer]

Chastised---deflecting criticism/learning from criticism

Criticism means someone didn't like something you did---not necessarily that he or she doesn't like who you are. Next time someone condemns you, especially if he mixes abuse with the criticism, don't react. Step out of yourself, imagine you are watching what is happening from somewhere else in the room. If you get angry, take yourself away and come back later. Separate what was said from the way it was said. Listen carefully, ask for clarification, and repeat back what you think you've heard. Acknowledge the extent to which you agree. This way you'll be able to evaluate the words calmly, decide whether they are justified, and know what you should do.

People often use criticism to keep others under control and to make themselves feel superior. If criticism is designed to hurt yu, the person dishing it out has his/her own problems that have little to do with you.

"The girl who can't dance says the band can't play."---Yiddish proverb

You don't have to accept criticism of yourself, just your behavior. Sometimes you can educate te person disparaging you and point out the difference. Tell him/her that you'd find it easier to accept criticism about what you did then who you are.

If nobody ever says anything bad about you, you are definitely not living up to your full potential!