Thread: Moods
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Old 7th February 2008, 20:00
Texasmujer Texasmujer is offline
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Chastised---deflecting criticism/learning from criticism

Criticism means someone didn't like something you did---not necessarily that he or she doesn't like who you are. Next time someone condemns you, especially if he mixes abuse with the criticism, don't react. Step out of yourself, imagine you are watching what is happening from somewhere else in the room. If you get angry, take yourself away and come back later. Separate what was said from the way it was said. Listen carefully, ask for clarification, and repeat back what you think you've heard. Acknowledge the extent to which you agree. This way you'll be able to evaluate the words calmly, decide whether they are justified, and know what you should do.

People often use criticism to keep others under control and to make themselves feel superior. If criticism is designed to hurt yu, the person dishing it out has his/her own problems that have little to do with you.

"The girl who can't dance says the band can't play."---Yiddish proverb

You don't have to accept criticism of yourself, just your behavior. Sometimes you can educate te person disparaging you and point out the difference. Tell him/her that you'd find it easier to accept criticism about what you did then who you are.

If nobody ever says anything bad about you, you are definitely not living up to your full potential!
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